Category: Keep Walking

Although the headlines provide positive news as well as negative, for example updates on the vaccine, it’s easy to find consuming the news an activity that puts us in a bad mood, disheartens or depresses us. It’s more important than ever to be aware of its impact on our mental health, and take self-care steps to limit this.

I think it’s important to be informed of what is going on, but also to know your limits as to how much you can consume before it affects your mental health. I also have a post on how to stop doomscrolling, but this is more generally with regard to how you stay updated with current events.

These days I think most people get their news from the internet rather than television or newspapers. The problem is that news websites are rabbit holes for doomscrolling. Every article can link to a dozen others, and maybe 5% are positive news. For this reason I try to avoid the internet as a source for news stories.

Timing

Ask yourself what time of day do you feel most able to cope with bad news. For me, it’s the morning. For others it may be later in the day so it doesn’t set them off in a negative frame of mind. I would recommend not doing the news last thing in the evening, though, because then the negativity could affect your sleep.

Find a good time of day for you to watch or listen to the headlines through television or radio. The benefit of these is they come with set time limits, as long as it’s not a news-only channel. Have a look around for what suits you best, and try and stay away from news sources the rest of the time. My doomscrolling post will have some tips on how to do that.

With Others

Depending on how connected you are with other people, you may find that you get updated a lot from friends, family, colleagues. Have a talk with them about setting some boundaries for when, how often and how long you spend talking about bad news.

If you don’t feel able to stay updated every day, then don’t put pressure on yourself out of a sense of needing to be aware of current events. Ask someone whom you trust to be mindful of your mental health to keep you updated on things you need to know—discuss between you what this covers, as it will be different for everyone, and let them know how best to do this, keeping in mind things like your best time of day for facing negativity.

If you have any other tips for this subject not covered here or in my doomscrolling post, please share them in the comments!

Doomscrolling, or whatever alternative term you prefer to use, is becoming more of a problem for many people during the pandemic, as it is linked to our survival instincts looking for potential threats.  Unfortunately, it also has a significant negative impact on mental health.

Set Limits

• For a phone or tablet, use your Screen Time feature or an app that can limit the amount of time you spend on particular apps and websites
• For a laptop or desktop, control the time you can spend on certain websites using a browser extension
• Disable push alerts for news apps (or remove them altogether), and remove news stories from your device Today View
• Control your exposure to news stories by changing your source(s)

Be Selective

Go through your list of accounts you follow, and decide whether the content is good for your mental health. In Facebook you can still like something or friend someone but remove them from your news feed. In other social media platforms you may only have a follow or unfollow option—if it’s something you want to be able to find again, bookmark it.

When someone posts on Facebook, they can choose who to share the post with. If you have friends whom you don’t want to unfollow but they sometimes post things you’d rather not see, try asking them if they would change their post settings so you don’t see those posts. If they’re not willing to do so, it’s time to unfollow.

If you decide to be really drastic, you can even get rid of your Facebook news feed altogether.

When you go on social media for a specific purpose (e.g. to send or read a message or partake in a group), avoid looking at your news feed at all—bookmark those pages in advance so you can head straight there, or you could even block the screen with your hand when you log on so you don’t see anything on your feed.

Some news sites have categories for good/uplifting news. While that’s great, be aware that, depending on the source, navigating to the stories themselves may lead to lots of negative headlines/links as with any other news page.

You can remove the Top News section from your Youtube homepage when signed in, and also remove specific channels from your recommended content.

Digital Pruning

I’ve heard this referred to as “digital amputation”, but I prefer the term pruning. This is more drastic than the other solutions, so it’s worth trying them first, and the limits of this should be tailored to your own self-awareness.

An example would be blocking yourself from social media altogether, using one of the apps mentioned above. You may decide to be more selective about which social media you block yourself from. This could be a permanent measure, or a temporary one as a detox to help break doomscrolling habits.

Need to Vent?

Sometimes we all need to get out some of the negativity we’ve absorbed. But to avoid inflicting negativity on other people—for example anyone following you on social media—vent in private. Vent at the walls if you live alone, or write it out in a notebook or type it up (a “brain dump”), but don’t share it. Delete or destroy it if you want.

A brain dump is something that many journalers do, which can be a good outlet, but it’s important to follow it up with something positive. Which brings me onto …

Do Something Positive

Follow up time spent doomscrolling (and venting if applicable) with something good for your mental well-being. This could be a hobby you enjoy, listening to some calming music, something creative, writing a list of gratitudes as mentioned in my journaling post.

If you have any tips not mentioned here or in my previous post, please share in the comments!

Other Helpful Links

Healthy internet use habits
How to stop doomscrolling in 6 steps
Some Good News Youtube channel
3 ways to stop doomscrolling
What is doomscrolling and how to stop
Changing the content of your timeline
How to stop doomscrolling and why you should
Unhack your smartphone
How to practise gratitude when everything sucks

As excited as I got when I first started looking into virtual travel, I confess I have been extremely bad at organising myself into not just looking for opportunities, but sitting down and doing them!

However last Sunday a friend told me about Virtual Trips, which is a site that runs amazing live virtual tours. That they run at a set time, and there’s lots of options all in one place nicely categorised, seems to have made all the difference, as I’ve done five in less than a week, and have more booked.

They are free, supported by tips, which go to the local professional guides and administration costs. All the ones I have looked at have been thirty or forty-five minutes, so they’re not too difficult to fit into your day—each one is a tour of an area or attraction in the region of your choice.

I highly recommend!

I actually drafted the bulk of this post back in November, but didn’t get around to posting it. Since then, Christmas lifting of restrictions were announced, and have since been cut back to just one day, and this morning I learned my county is moving from Tier 2 to Tier 4 on Boxing Day. So I’ve had to bring it drastically up to date!

I’d previously discussed on this blog wanting to form a support bubble with my family*, but hadn’t taken into account the fact that my mother frequently provides help to my grandmother, who has a cleaner and regularly sees other family. So that unfortunately ended that idea, as that’s too much human contact for me to feel safe.

I’m an early Christmas planner, but this year I’d spent several months trying to avoid thinking about Christmas, because the subject frankly scared me. Whatever the restrictions, I was hesitant to do what I would normally do, which is stay with my parents and brother for a couple of days. After an hour’s visit from the plumber of all things (which with my anxiety was hugely stressful and took me nearly a week to recover from), I realised I was kidding myself if I thought I’d be able to handle spending time in someone else’s house, so started thinking about what we could do instead.

Virtual Christmas

I find socialising in person very draining—it takes me quite a while to recover from Christmas just from the time spent around other people—and socialising via video call is much more intense. One of my concerns about doing a digital Christmas would be that I wouldn’t be able to cope with more than a few hours actually spent with my family, and would be alone the rest of the time. Which did not appeal.

However, I thought of a potential solution which we trialled a few weeks ago and went well! As free Zoom accounts can do one-to-one calls for an unlimited time, and that’s one device rather than one person, I had the idea of setting up a Zoom connection first thing in the morning and just putting the device aside for the day, so we could hear each as if we were in the same house. Though we spent some of the time talking virtually face-to-face, most of that time my iPad was beside me rather than in front and it made all the difference. That is our plan for tomorrow.

One silver lining this year is that we can “attend” the Christmas service run by my own church. I have never gone to one in the six years I’ve been a member, because it’s too far away from my parents’ house. But since they’re doing online services and have an online Christmas one, we’re going to all tune into that one together. We did so for the carol service as well, which is always a highlight of my Christmas!

Normally at Christmas we play at least one board game, usually Monopoly. Early into lockdown, we attempted to play Monopoly together over Facetime. I found this didn’t work very well for me; because I couldn’t see the board properly, and my concentration issues, I lost track of what properties etc I “had” (my dad was being my hands) and where I was on the board. I’m not sure virtual games will work very well for my family’s situation, so I did consider looking for other games we could play together—unfortunately as I edit this post I’ve realised I forgot! Maybe we can improvise.

All the Trimmings!

Christmas food is a big planning thing for me, as I’m on a very restrictive low protein diet*, so most foods have to be made from scratch. I’ve spent the last month or so food planning and creating: low protein “bacon”, low protein stuffing, low protein chocolate … the list goes on. (Some of the items were delegated to my mum, who’s always happy to cook things for me.) I’m trying to launch a low protein cooking blog in which I’ll be doing a more in-depth post on my Christmas food, so if you’re curious check back later and hopefully I’ll be able to add the link soon.

To everyone who’s planning to take advantage of the one-day festive bubble, please consider very, very carefully. I’d like to make a suggestion that Joanna Lumley said on Breakfast this morning. (Paraphrasing because I didn’t write it down.) Let December 25th just be a day, and when you can all get together safely, make that your Christmas Day. Although my family and I already have our plans for tomorrow, I expect that when we can all get together safely, we’ll treat it as a celebration of all the occasions we’ve not been able to do in person together.

I learned on the news this morning that it’s Small Business Saturday today. There was a feature about the current state of the high street, and included discussion on small high street businesses.

I’ve always preferred the idea of shopping independently and locally, but given I largely had to rely on online even before the pandemic, this was difficult. I also don’t have a huge amount of energy to spend searching for independent/local online suppliers which have what I need, and my go-to therefore is largely Amazon. I have a local independent supermarket, but that still requires a 20-minute train journey and walking up a hill, which given my health meant I could only visit when I was already in the area for something else and had the additional energy required.

However recently I have begun taking some small steps to begin changing my online shopping habits.

Shopping Independently Online

Through Twitter I discovered Bookshop.org, where you can purchase books from independent bookshops. I haven’t done so yet but I have started a wish list on there! For anyone in southeast England who enjoys quality tea and coffee, I discovered Edgcumbes and The Kent and Sussex Tea and Coffee Company when looking for local suppliers. I like Edgcumbes’ ethics and TK&SC’s huge range of blends.

If you’re thinking about Christmas presents, Etsy is an excellent place to find handmade gifts by small businesses and individuals. Just be sure to use the filter to search local listings, and check the predicted delivery dates. You can also find some beautiful Christmas decorations on there if you need some new ones.

I will continue to look for new places to buy from, and I’d like to encourage people that even if you’re unable to go out to physical shops, changing your shopping habits isn’t too difficult if you aim to do so one small step at a time, without putting too much pressure on yourself. If you know of a local small business whom you’re unable to support in this way right now, give them a shout out on social media or a review today. It’s Small Business Saturday.

#SmallBizSatUK

As consumers we’re being encouraged to think about, and prepare for, Christmas early this year, to enable retailers to manage the demands of Christmas shopping. At least, that was the case before the second lockdown was announced. Since then the focus has very much been on the lockdown itself and the various consequences.

It’s expected that 2020 will be the most digital Christmas yet, and the advice is/was to start now so that retailers don’t get overwhelmed in December. There is also the fact that on the high street, the Christmas rush—assuming the lockdown isn’t extended beyond the second of December—will have to be a socially distanced one this year.

I drafted most of this post before the announcement of Lockdown 2.0. Though in my opinion a necessary and overdue action, the fact is this will make pre-December and, if the lockdown is extended, pre-Christmas shopping more complicated, with a much bigger shift online if non-essential shops are closed. Unfortunately this means more high street businesses missing out on what would normally be their busiest and most profitable time of year. It may also be counter-productive to the “plan ahead, do your shopping early” advice that I started writing this post in reaction to a few days before the lockdown was announced.

Planning Ahead

I would recommend planning now if you haven’t already. Obviously, with ever-changing restrictions and the uncertainty of whether or not this lockdown will end on December 2nd, it is impossible to plan everything this far in advance, but some things will be givens.

Unfortunately it’s impossible during lockdown to support high street shops unless they are selling online, but if you can, do your Christmas shopping through them. Sites like Etsy are good for unique gifts by individuals or small businesses, but make sure to take note of shop location and delivery times.

If you have presents and cards to send to loved ones, especially those who live abroad, I would strongly suggest doing those as far in advance as possible. If they are people you are hoping to be able to see but don’t know if you will be able, my advice would be to send them anyway in case restrictions mean you can’t.

Visitors

When considering who to see this year, please be sensible. Talk to anyone vulnerable in your family to discuss the potential risks and how comfortable they would feel visiting or having visitors. In this time of uncertainty, I would say “Plan for the worst, hope for the best”. Have alternative options decided on in advance of Christmas restrictions being announced.

For those who don’t have the internet, a “digital Christmas” is not going to work. If you have for instance an elderly relative(s) in such a category, could you perhaps lend them a phone or other internet-connected device to use? (And show them how to use it in advance! Writing down instructions in case they can’t remember on the day would also be a good idea.)

If that’s not an option, consider socialising by phone if that’s possible. Alternatively, you could hold a pre-Christmas Christmas if they are happy and able to do that and restrictions allow—for instance if you are in a support bubble, or after the lockdown ends.

Do what you can to prevent those you love who will be alone on Christmas Day from being lonely. Make sure they know you will be thinking of them. You could write them letters for them to open on Christmas Day. Perhaps you could agree to all tune into something on the television at the same time, so they can know you are all “watching together”.

It’s the first day of Lockdown 2.0, and also the fifth of November. Given that all public firework displays have been cancelled, there is concern from the fire services that many more people than usual will be doing DIY fireworks in their gardens.

This could mean several things. Firstly and most importantly, that the fire service’s busiest night of the year is likely to be much, much busier than normal.

Some people might be organising DIY fireworks for the first time, if they would normally go to public displays, and do not have the experience of having done them before. Others might be rushing to organise something that should really be planned ahead and proper safety measures organised. Consider doing fireworks on a different night if tonight is too soon to properly prepare. (My family and I had our fireworks last night. There is nothing wrong with celebrating on a different day! I’ve been hearing fireworks in my area for the last three or so nights and I’m sure I will for several more nights.)

Given that stocks of fireworks may be low by now and non-essential retailers will be closed from today, you may be tempted to buy fireworks from non-reputable sources, such as through social media. These may not conform to safety standards and could be very dangerous.

Some people might decide to ignore government restrictions and invite friends and family over for private displays. Please do not do this.

Guidance for home fireworks can be found here. If you decide to hold a bonfire, this is the guidance from the same website:

• Don’t site it too near your display or firework storage
• Never use flammable liquids like paraffin or petrol to get it going as this can result in uncontrolled spread of fire or explosion
• Check immediately before lighting that there’s no animal or even a young child hidden inside
• Never put fireworks on a bonfire, even if they’re dud
• Don’t burn dangerous rubbish (e.g. aerosols, paint tins or foam-filled furniture)
• Afterwards, the bonfire needs to be put out completely.

Unfortunately I only had the idea for this post this morning, and wasn’t able to finish it as early as I would have liked, but on the off chance it reaches someone for whom the information is helpful, I’m posting it now anyway.

On Wednesday morning I watched this beautiful segment on BBC Breakfast, and knew I had to share it on this blog. It moved me to tears, and I wasn’t the only one.

Paul Harvey, the composer of “Four Notes”, hears his piece performed by the BBC Philharmonic Orchestra for the first time, and gets a surprise afterwards!

The piece, released as “Four Notes – Paul’s Tune” is available for download now, with proceeds going to the Altzheimer’s Society and Music For Dementia. I’ve bought my copy, and am listening to it now!

I don’t celebrate Halloween, but I’m aware that many people do, and with it coming up I thought I would make a seasonal post on responsible ways to do so this year.

Although we in the UK don’t have as much of the Halloween hype as the US, trick-or-treating is a thing here, as are Halloween parties. The CDC have advised against traditional trick-or-treating this year, and obviously traditional parties are currently not a safe option in a pandemic.

(Note: I saw on the news after drafting this post that Halloween has been “cancelled” in Wales this year. Please make sure you adhere to your local restrictions, and don’t go trick-or-treating if it has been banned in your area.)

Covid-Secure Suggestions:

• Go Virtual

If you would normally hold or go to a Halloween party or costume contest, attend or host one over Zoom!

Virtual film nights are also an option.

• Trick or Treating

Organise in advance with your neighbours, to check that they are happy for you to knock on their door, and to arrange contact-free ways to deliver individually-wrapped sweets. Make sure to keep to social distancing rules and your regional lockdown restrictions. If dressing up in costume, be careful not to sacrifice the effectiveness of a face covering for aesthetic reasons!

• Within Your Household

Celebrate on a smaller scale, at home within your own household or support bubble. Plan a film night, themed game night, scavenger hunt, etc.

Non-Covid Considerations:

While this isn’t a pandemic-related note, it is Halloween-related, and something I feel strongly about, so wanted to include.

• Pumpkins

Carving pumpkins are edible, and yet the majority of them are discarded every year. Food waste is a big issue that I’m passionate about, so I couldn’t not mention this. The internet is full of ways to use pumpkin flesh in food and beauty recipes; alternatively you could make a DIY jack-o-lantern from other material such as papier-mâché. (Just don’t put a candle in it; papier-mâché is flammable!)

“If you can’t see light at the end of the tunnel, keep walking.”

I don’t know why it took me so long to come up with this title! Many, many years ago, that one sentence in a sermon at my parents’ church resonated with me powerfully and became my personal motto.

It’s absolutely perfect for the situation today, and in fact for all difficult circumstances. So the title of this blog is now “Keep Walking” instead of “Life in Lockdown”. It’s much more positive and hopeful, doesn’t automatically make people think of current life problems, and much better describes my vision for this blog.

So whoever you are, wherever you read this, this is my message to you today. Keep walking through that metaphorical tunnel.